22/05/2025

two blog posts within a week?!?!?! what sorcery is this
this post is slightly more personal, but i feel the need to share it because i can't hide it for much longer

Making Provocative Media

when you think about controversial media, i'm probably not the first person to come to mind. alcohol references and slightly edgy jokes aside, i keep my image pretty clean. part of the motivation for it is that i want to be able to show it to people in real life, who know me as an upstanding member of society without any skeletons in the closet. self-moderation kind of arises naturally in that sort of one-against-all environment

there are several reasons why you might want to provoke people with media. maybe:

• you want to raise awareness for a particular societal or political issue;
• you don't believe in bad publicity and simply want attention;
• you're sick and twisted in the head and want to vent out all your horrible ideas to an impressionable audience; or
• provocation is a byproduct of your media that helps you get rid of the bad apples in your audience

with that said, what are my reasons for considering causing offense with the stuff i do?

the first reason doesn't really apply to me. yes, i have plenty of opinions - some of them i feel very strongly about - but frankly, they are none of your business unless you specifically goad me into sharing them. no matter where you stand politically, no matter who i vote for, it will upset you. i don't want that, which is why this is not a political blog. if i have an opinion worth voicing, the political undertone is subtle (to the best of my ability) and the emphasis is on the work it's a part of

the second reason is antithetical to my content creation "strategy". sure, i pride myself on some crude jokes and i'm the butt of several more, but as stated three or four sentences earlier, i don't want to be an active enemy to my own audience. more than that, i'm deathly afraid of getting properly cancelled. an oversight or a sneaky detail shouldn't ruin my life. strong opinions about the average twitter iq aside, i generally want to be palatable to "normal" people. as such, being an attention whore is a non-starter for me

the third reason is where it gets interesting. i'll be the first to admit that i have 2 sides... The left side ... and the right side .....



no but seriously i have some modestly fucked up ideas bottled up because of reason #2. i'd very much like to express them, i'd definitely feel freer as a person. i just think most people would hate me for it, and i'll regret having done so somewhere down the line anyway. rest assured, though, that if i can guarantee that there's no stigma, i will get pretty freaky (though half the world would still out-freak me, all things considered)

that's not to say i don't sprinkle my freak throughout my content. i was incredibly nervous about dropping s4e8 of smpvideo, as anyone who can be bothered to solve a puzzle on the internet or has functioning eyes can reconstruct so much more about They Who Shall Not Be Named than i let on more obviously. more sneakily, i've been wearing the same black gloves since season 4, and the one thing i can tell you is that it isn't leather and never has been. enjoy that thought :)

all of this culminates in the fourth reason: after all my sanitation work, if you're still upset about what you see and i can't find a way to level with you, you can get off my shit. that is generally the lowest of the lowest though, you'd have to be an advanced-level asshole to get that kind of treatment from me. trolls aren't of note here either (i've seen enough to smell them from a mile away), this is strictly about people who are genuinely and irreconcilably offended. you can't please literally everyone, so i won't

so, what does all this mean for you? simple: send me e-mails! let me know that you're as ready as you've ever been for the most ambiwhelmingly ungrotesque twisted artistic expression you've ever seen. tell me that i can be myself. tell me that you'll kill me if i start being myself. whatever the command may be, if i get some clarity, you will get some peak content

now watch me delete this post in 3 days